Today is the first anniversary of the day we moved to Jackson. After living in and raising our two girls in Fair Oaks CA for 22 years, we were compelled to move out of the area when we went through a painful riff with our older daughter, who lived in the same neighborhood. As I have said, I couldn't take the thought of running into her and her children while out running errands. I didn't want that setting to be the first time that I met my grandchildren. So we started our search in March 2013 and after looking in Amador County for several weeks, we found the perfect house for us in Jackson. We've now been here a year. It has been the best thing for us.
The deep depression that I went into because of the past five years has been lifting bit by bit, in no small part because of the peaceful sanctuary that Tom and I are creating. Our house is a beautifully sprawling 2700 sq. ft. that I've decorated to look like a beach house. We have a basement with a pool table, a sewing area and a wine cellar. My yard is big enough to keep me occupied for the next several years as I attempt to beat back the jungle that is currently out there. I can walk my dog in the hills behind our house and see nothing but horses and cows. And one of the best things is that I can run errands in our small town of 4400 without lots of traffic and most of all, without the fear of seeing someone who knew our daughter.
In the year that we've lived in this house, we've made a few changes. We took out the nasty green indoor-outdoor carpeting that was in the basement. Part of the floor now has tile so that when I'm sewing or doing crafts and drop something, which I do quite often, I can easily find it. The rest of the floor has a soft plush carpet. I painted the walls a bright teal. We still have a bit to do down there, but it is coming along. We replaced our front door with a more secure door with a security screen. We also replaced the French doors off our dining room with more secure French doors and security screens. I painted the master bedroom and master bathroom, replacing the mint green with a color called "Milk Toast." It looks like wet sand. I cleaned out the pond that came with the yard and now have five goldfish living there. This is down from the eleven that were in the pond. One Sunday morning I came out and found that carnage, mayhem and murder had taken place during the night and six of my fish had perished. We also have had four little frogs living in the fountain that is outside our French doors, giving us some summer music. But with the colder temperatures, the frogs are in hibernation.We'll see them again in the spring.
That's not to say that the sadness we feel is gone. It isn't. And until we reach a reconciliation, the sadness will continue. But we are doing the best we can with what we've got. I'm working with a naturopath as I attempt to become healthier after the stress of so much sadness. I'm working on changing the way I think about our situation, concentrating on happy moments. It's a little thing that has made a big impact. The greatest thing is that we are looking forward. So in our case, change has been good.
